Numb

My sweet tooth finally caught up to me. I have two cavities.

Well, seeing as I would like to see my teeth stay in my mouth, I decided to get them filled.

First, the dentist numbed the area with some "tastey" cherry flavored topical cream. This seemed to do a pretty decent job of making my mouth feel fuzzy and tingly. After the topical anesthetic, he injected a deeper local anesthetic to numb the root of the tooth.

Although seeing that needle coming at my face was a wee bit unnerving, I knew I would probably thank him later.

The whole process took about 30 minutes and I left with the knowledge that those particular two cavities wouldn't be a problem any longer.

There was just one problem. I couldn't feel my face.

If I hadn't known what happened, I would have swore I had had a stroke. Or that someone had sliced half my face off. Except that when I reached up to touch the lips that I was sure had disappeared, they were still intact. With a little drool leaking out the side. How attractive.

I tried to eat lunch. That was a trick. I knew my lips, my teeth and the right side of my tongue were there, but I couldn't feel them. No matter how I chewed, I couldn't, for the life of me, feel what that side of my mouth was doing.

Eerily, however, my brain knew what to do. Even though the feeling in my face was non-existent, my brain knew that - whether I felt them or not - my lips were there.

I think God can be like that sometimes.

Each day is different. Sometimes, God feels so close that you can imagine him standing next to you. You can envision Him holding your hand. The feeling can be so strong it drives you to your knees or has tears streaming down your face.

Other days, it's as if there is a local anesthetic in your life. You're numb. Incapable of feeling His presence if you stabbed your face with a fork.

On those days, it can be so hard to remember that He is still there.

Sometimes, no matter how hard you chew, the feeling just won't come.

But that doesn't mean He's gone. It doesn't mean he's left. Scripture tells us he won't EVER leave us or forsake us.

It's on those days that we need to remember the Truth that is manifested in our heart. That truth that screams, "Lord, you're there, even though my pitiful senses can't feel you." We need that heart memory to remember how to believe, even when believing seems impossible.

So, even though you might not feel your face right now, the feeling will come back.

Sometimes with a little soreness. Or maybe just with the fact that you can actually feel your mouth turn up in a smile...

So let your brain remember how to chew. Don't rely on nerves that so easily lose their feeling.

"You love him even though you have never seen him. Though you do not see him now, you trust him; and you rejoice with a glorious inexpressible joy." ~ 1 Peter 1:8